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Thursday, May 07, 2009

Tales of the Tooth Fairy

My son has lost a total of eight teeth... something like that..., and the tooth fairy has not been doing a good job of keeping track.

The first tooth my son lost was at a friend's house. He was showing her his loose tooth while they were jumping on the trampoline, and out it came. He was mortified. She was excited. (She'd already lost one, so she was excited for him.)

This girl's mother was amazing. She not only calmed him down and stopped the bleeding, but she helped the kids do art projects "celebrating" the occasion.

Yes, I'm serious.

My son was still in a state of shock when he came home from her house. He was so quiet all afternoon. It was really ...peaceful.

The next morning when he received the cash, he was thrilled. And I do mean thrilled! I caught him staring at himself in the mirror while he touched each and every tooth in hopes that another might be loose.

After a while, though, the tooth fairy got sloppy. A few months later, a tooth was still under the pillow in the morning. Fortunately, I was able to make the switch when I happened to check before my son.

Right after that incident, the tooth fairy didn't show up yet again. This time my son didn't forget to check. It was his birthday, too. I told him that the tooth fairy didn't work on holidays (his birthday is July 4th), so we would just try again tomorrow.

This past Wednesday morning, I heard a very loud "Awww!!" from my son's room. You guessed it --no tooth fairy. So, once again I am forced to come up with a (somewhat) creative lie.

Me: "Oh, I know what happened!"

Him: "What?"

Me: "Didn't you lose that tooth late last night?"

Him: "Yeah. Right before I went to bed."

Me: "See... the tooth fairy had already left her house with her bag of money. She didn't get your name on her list in time. It will be there tonight." (All the while, I'm shaking my head like an idiot trying to convince him I'm right.)

Him: "Oh." Quite possibly the saddest, most pathetic "oh" I've ever heard.

Sure enough the next morning, the tooth was gone with $2 in its place. (Guilt money.)

And so tonight, while we were cleaning up after dinner, my son opened a kitchen drawer (I have no idea why), and pulled out a baggie. Not just any baggie, but one with his tooth.

Him: "Look. It's a tooth." (No excitement... only confusion...)

My husband looked at me, and I looked at him. Whoever my son looked at first for a response was going to have to be the one to come up with a super spectacular lie.

He looked at my husband.


So, my husband calmly tells him, "Oh, yeah, the tooth fairy dropped that on the sidewalk outside the house. I picked it up this morning."

My son just looks at him.

I say nothing.

Suddenly, my son's eyes open really wide, and he gets a huge grin on his face -"Now I get to put the tooth under my pillow again for MORE money!"

My husband looked at me, and I looked at him.

Smart kid.

The tooth is under his pillow right now. :-)

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